Pills. And I’m not talking about doctor-prescribed pills. I’m referring to those ones that us disordered fellows self-prescribe. You know the ones. The diet pills, the colon cleansing pills, the laxatives, the ones that supposedly help your nails and hair, the ones for energy, the ones for metabolism, so on and so on.
I currently have 5 pills. My pills change, last year I had like 9 but 4 of them were the same pill, you just took 4 at a time. My current pills are prenatal vitamins and iron pills, both suggested by my former therapist. Laxatives, a B vitamin supplement, and a mega green tea weight loss pill.
Now, I hate taking pills. My esophagus is highly damaged (darn purging) and doesn’t push things down properly. So pills tend to become lodged in my throat and require plenty of water flushing to clear them out. They also tend to make me nauseous for a good hour or two.
But there’s something about pills. I can’t seem to stop taking them. First of all, I’ve been consistently losing 2 pounds a day since I started this new weight loss drug. I’m now just 9 pounds away from my low weight. (Take that recovery weight!) I take the B vitamins because my family on both sides is known to be vitamin B deficient and it has many benefits. (Can we say increased metabolism, better skin, better muscles to name a few?) The iron I take because I am low on iron. The laxatives I take a for a few reasons, weight loss not being one of them. I feel much cleaner and purer when on them and I actually have bowl movements while on them. (I know you were wanting to know that) I don’t take more than the recommended amount….just for longer.
But yeah, the actual taking of the pills is a pain. Today was harder than most days. I had trouble gathering my resolve to do it. Almost like eating when I was in recovery. You know it’s good for you, but that doesn’t make it easier. I generally have to consume about a half gallon of water just to take all 5 pills. And then it usually still feels like something’s in my throat. Aggravating.
Filed under: Day to Day Life | Tagged: anorexia, b complex, bulimia, calories, eating disorder, eating disorders, green tea, iron, laxatives, pill, pills, prenatal, pro-ana, pro-recover, pro-recovery, proana, purge, recover, recovery, restrict, rexia, supplement, vitamin, weight loss
You’re addicted. And you can’t stop. But they’re killing you.
My vitamins are killing me? *confused look*
The green tea weight loss pill + laxative use.
Well, I appreciate your concern.